An expectation is a strong belief that something will happen or be the case or someone will or could achieve something.

Everyone will have their own expectation towards most of the things in life. We expect our parents to always defend us, even though we’re wrong. We expect our friends to always be there for us in whatever situation. We expect ourselves not being able to do something.

Some of these expectations might hurt you and some others might surprise you.

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Too high expectation will disappoint you. For example, you expect yourself to do well in the exam while you never attend lectures and tutorial classes, also never do your revision. That will ruin your confidence in a way once you see the practice exam paper, and definitely disappoint you too.

At some point, that might be good for you to learn that you have got to stay humble. You have to know your capabilities, what you can achieve. Consider it as a warning.

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In other cases, you might expect yourself capable of doing things that you have never done before. Another example would be when two years ago I thought I will not be able to do what I am doing now. I did not know that I will be able to achieve what I have achieved now. I thought it will be hard to make friends in Australia, yet I have a group which I can call my family, my shelter.

I surpassed my own expectation and that is amazing, that totally surprised me.

Hence, just be careful of your expectation. You have to think about it carefully. Don’t put too much weight on one side, and less on the other side. Use your own judgment. Be sure that your expectation won’t hurt you, instead, it will be better if it can surprise you! Sometimes, by lowering your expectation you can protect yourself.

You might expect your employee to do something better and when they don’t, you have to lower your expectation and tell them what are your goals and what they can do to help you, or maybe to fix the situation.

Another thing, this is what I constantly get reminded of:

You are not able to please everyone. You please one group and the other will criticise you. Therefore you are changing and become the person they wanted, then another group might criticise you. You will always have your supporter, while others might try to ruin you and give more obstacles to make you fall.

So just be yourself!  Instead of keeping on trying to fulfill the expectation of others and you are suffering while trying to do so, be proud of who you are! Please yourself, accept who you are and be happy.

Also read the first and third part to see how they are all related!

part 1: friendship guidelines                      part 3: Love Languages

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